Wednesday, November 20, 2013

The Other End of the Line

I just watched Jonas Cuaron's short film ANINGAAQ. It's the other side of the call Sandra Bullock has in GRAVITY. I will admit that I wasn't a huge fan of either films, but I do think they are both quite beautiful. The short got me thinking of those times in life when you are feeling really distressed and somehow find yourself connecting or almost connecting with a stranger. While I think 99% of those times usually don't involve one person stuck on a damaged space station somewhere in orbit, it can still feel like that when you are all alone.

I remember one time being super depressed about life. I was home alone in my apartment and feeling pretty shitty and hopeless, when the phone range. I picked it up and it was a total stranger. Someone who was feeling totally hopeless and shitty too. He just wanted to connect with someone. He needed to reach out. Maybe if I hadn't been feeling the way I was I could have been a shoulder. But I just couldn't. I felt pretty awful when I told him that. He understood, or at least said he did, and we hung up. Then I crawled into the fetal position and bawled my eyes out.

I play this moment over in my mind sometimes. I don't know what that person on the other end of the line was going through and I don't know how it played out. I hope that I didn't make it worse, but I also feel like I wasn't going to make it better. I did understand how he felt. Sometimes you can't reach out to the people closest to you. Sometimes there is no one to reach out to. Sometimes you just need to hear it's going to be okay, but there isn't anyone to tell you that.

Anyway, this short made me think of that moment. What's yours?

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Hold on Tight

Em likes to dance on the coffee table. She's a free spirit hard to contain. She's got moves. But her latest move isn't to the music as much as when she's done with the dance. She slides to the edge of the table and reaches out her tiny hands and takes my finger. She doesn't need the help to get down, but she wants it and I love it. The first time your kid reaches up and wants to hold your hand is amazing. The second that tiny hand wraps around your index finger you suddenly get a glimpse into the future. This is the first time they want your help navigating the world and then there will be a point in time when that isn't the case anymore. A time when they will want to dance on the coffee tables of the universe without your help. You won't even be there and they won't call to tell you about it and maybe years later when the statue of limitations has ended you will hear the epic stories. But for now, they want to hold your hand - so you gladly lend it and enjoy it while it lasts.